Ericka Clay started a post with Well, shit… Le Clown joined her readership. Ericka has a great name, and is a self-proclaimed procrastinator… Le Clown thought: she must be great. Ericka wrote a heartfelt and powerful post on anxiety and depression… Le Clown and Ericka became BFF 4EVS. Since then, Le Clown has been campaigning to see Creative Liar featured on The Daily Post, even if she won’t be my friend on Facebook. Ericka, the floor is all yours… Enjoy your blogroll induction…
Le Clown is a clown. Everyone assumes this is why he’s so amazing but that’s only because most people have the assumption skills of a two-headed salmon that made out with its cousin then tweeted about it. That’s why I decided it was pertinent to list twenty-one reasons why Le Clown is just as awesome as my brand new pair of Skechers Shape Ups and that one dude at the grocery store who said I had distinguished clavicles:
- Le Clown invented blogging and when that got too easy, he invented the f-word.
- Le Clown is really Chuck Norris.
- Le Clown is one of only three people who can digest my mother’s meatloaf. The other two are dead.
- When Le Clown sings its what a vial of coke must sound like.
- When I grow up I want to be Le Clown, but for now I’m okay with just having distinguished clavicles and attached earlobes that just won’t quit.
- My middle name is “Le Clown.”
- When Le Clown was seven he beat up a mime.
- You know what rhymes with Le Clown? “Fuck yeah.”
- Le Clown speaks French, which is the designated language of people smarter than me.
- Two weeks ago Brad Pitt asked Le Clown if they could trade faces.
- Le Clown is cooler than my mom and she once high fived the entire cast of Fame in the face.
- Le Clown doesn’t wear clothes. Clothes have the privilege of wearing him.
- Le Clown once gave birth to a unicorn. It was made of money and baby smiles.
- Le Clown once robbed a bank and the bank thanked him.
- Le Clown’s footwear is specifically chosen for its ball busting capabilities.
- If Le Clown smiles at you, your team will automatically win the Superbowl.
- If Le Clown frowns at you, you’ll poop your pants.
- At my six-month review with my boss, I simply said “Le Clown.” I now own half the company.
- I had a Le Clown costume custom made for me. I’ve only worn it on special occasions like church and my uncle’s colonoscopy.
- When Le Clown gets sleepy the whole world yawns.
- Le Clown is friends with me and I only make it a habit to be friends with people I can steal money from and he lives too far away for that. Sadly.
Thank you Le Clown for bestowing upon me the greatest honor known to woman other than marrying Prince William and telling off Stacy Logan who said I’d never get my period back in the sixth grade. Look at me now Stacy!! Look at me now!!!!!